Body-language and nonverbal communication

Archive
Tag "relationship"

To smell and to taste a new culture is to meet yourself

By: Ulrich Sollmann
28-04-2013
intercultural, psychology, society

To smell and to taste a new culture is to meet yourself

Some weeks ago I talked to a German manager and sinologist, who had worked in China for a couple of years. His first visit to China was about thirty years ago. Perfect in reading and writing, really well-experienced in relating to Chinese people, he knew, what he was talking about.

We talked about relating to Chinese people as well as to people from other cultures. Both we were convinced of a big difference in intercultural communication.

On the one hand it is almost too simple to doubt on this fact.  On the other hand many people seem not to know the essence of the following message:

When you learn a language, when ……….

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Sex in ancient China

By: Ulrich Sollmann
26-04-2013
intercultural, psychology, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sex in ancient China…….

was meant:

  • to feel sexual enjoyment
  • to experience health development
  • and for reproduction.

There is a very old tradition in understanding sexuality like this and to practice certain sexual skills.

When talking to young Chinese I often ……….

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Permission to ask a personal question?

By: Ulrich Sollmann
19-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, society

 

Permission to ask a personal question?

If I’m interested in a person I ask him, put questions or show my interest in order to get to know more about this or that.

Chinese often hesitate to address me or others with a personal, direct question just like: “Oh, can you tell me more about your life or your children and so on”. This, as I was told by others, also can happen if you know each other better.

This does not mean that a Chinese isn’t interested, not at all! He or she is often very interested but tries to avoid to put or “tear” the other into public by putting such a question. If he or she would put this direct personal question, the other one either could feel himself obliged to show up with an answer or if he doesn’t want to do it to show up (in a personal way as an personal expression) he has to dissociate himself.

On the other hand I experience …….

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Seasickness is not good for business

By: Ulrich Sollmann
17-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seasickness is not good for business

One can observe intercultural integration in various social fields just like buying a cruiser. Rich Chinese can afford such boats more and more. They also have a special look on the architecture of these boats. This architecture has of course to mirror special Chinese aspects of being related to one another (guanxi). Here some examples:

  • Chinese prefer very big and very representative boats. Many of them also prefer a landing place for helicopters. J Price doesn’t matter
  • There has to be a hard top because Chinese women like to have ……….
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nonverbal training to become a professional

By: Ulrich Sollmann
16-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nonverbal training to become a professional

last week I came across this little picture at fb. It shows how important the nonverbal approach in psychotherapy is. It also shows how simple it is on the one hand and how difficult to learn. 🙂

Try yourself at home, with your friends or colleagues…..and you will realize how humerous or how dangerous it can be to behave like this.

Enjoy.

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Sexuality and satisfaction in virtuality

By: Ulrich Sollmann
06-04-2013
intercultural, News, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sexuality and satisfaction in virtuality

So called connected pleasure givers will be sold from the end of April on in China. It is another kind of artificial or instrumentalized way to find sexual satisfaction (alone, on one`own). It is a new way to give oneself and / or the other one, that means a partner or any other virtual person, sexual satisfaction without being together. Together means: both are not at the same place, in the same room but are connected via internet. They are both part of a virtual world.

They say that long distance relationships do not last not because the couples fall out of love, but because they miss ………..

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The direct look into someone`s eyes

By: Ulrich Sollmann
30-03-2013
Body language, intercultural, nonverbal communication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The direct look into someone`s eyes

Of course people in China look at each other, look into each other’s eyes. But often, especially in specific management situations, negotiations and so on it is not opportune to look into the other’s eyes too intensively, too long or to directly. This could be experienced as too close, too emotional and too offensive.

I get the fantasy that Chinese look at each other but really are not familiar with the experience of “to show up” and “to be seen”. Experiencing such a situation would be to …………

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Woman flirting with her hair

By: Ulrich Sollmann
29-03-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, psychology

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Woman flirting with her hair

Here is one more little information about I will call it „hair-gestures“ of women. It is quite, as probably most of you will know, important for the relationship between men and women. 😉

Here are four quite important gestures which are familiar to people in the western hemisphere:

  • A woman softly touches her hair and throws it back. This means “Hello, I want and need your awareness”
  • A woman is talking to you and puts her hair behind her ear. She shows that she feels very good and familiar in this situation, together with you.
  • If a woman tears her hair (out) and…………….
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Rich is……….

By: Ulrich Sollmann
23-03-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Rich is……….

the one who is satisfied and happy”

Aristoteles

(Greek Philosopher 384-322 before Christ)

….I often think of this when regarding the relationship of many people in China and the Western world towards money and materialism in their daily life. I think of how much this characterizes our life and the way how people relate to each other.

I at the same time realize that many especially young people care for their hope, not to be too materialistic, not to be ruled by money.

And I also realize how hard but also how pleasant this job is. 🙂

foto by http://www.flickr.com/photos/thetypecloud/

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Our dreams are different……

By: Ulrich Sollmann
23-01-2013
intercultural, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our dreams are different……

When I saw these photoes which a Chinese friend of mine showed to me I was not really shocked by the information (because I already had experienced the same here in Germany), but really felt a pity about those difficulties in relating to each other even if you want to do or you have to.

These difficulties can be seen all over the Western countries. How will it be in China concerning Western students living and studying in China?

Who can tell?

I also felt ashamed imagening the feelings of those CHinese students who show up on those photoes. How do they feel? Especially being together with other students and not really meeting them, not really touching them or being touched.

http://2011.soulofathens.com/our-dreams-are-different/not-here-or-there-1.html

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