Body-language and nonverbal communication

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intercultural

Permission to ask a personal question?

By: Ulrich Sollmann
19-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, society

 

Permission to ask a personal question?

If I’m interested in a person I ask him, put questions or show my interest in order to get to know more about this or that.

Chinese often hesitate to address me or others with a personal, direct question just like: “Oh, can you tell me more about your life or your children and so on”. This, as I was told by others, also can happen if you know each other better.

This does not mean that a Chinese isn’t interested, not at all! He or she is often very interested but tries to avoid to put or “tear” the other into public by putting such a question. If he or she would put this direct personal question, the other one either could feel himself obliged to show up with an answer or if he doesn’t want to do it to show up (in a personal way as an personal expression) he has to dissociate himself.

On the other hand I experience …….

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Seasickness is not good for business

By: Ulrich Sollmann
17-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seasickness is not good for business

One can observe intercultural integration in various social fields just like buying a cruiser. Rich Chinese can afford such boats more and more. They also have a special look on the architecture of these boats. This architecture has of course to mirror special Chinese aspects of being related to one another (guanxi). Here some examples:

  • Chinese prefer very big and very representative boats. Many of them also prefer a landing place for helicopters. J Price doesn’t matter
  • There has to be a hard top because Chinese women like to have ……….
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nonverbal training to become a professional

By: Ulrich Sollmann
16-04-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nonverbal training to become a professional

last week I came across this little picture at fb. It shows how important the nonverbal approach in psychotherapy is. It also shows how simple it is on the one hand and how difficult to learn. 🙂

Try yourself at home, with your friends or colleagues…..and you will realize how humerous or how dangerous it can be to behave like this.

Enjoy.

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Sexuality and satisfaction in virtuality

By: Ulrich Sollmann
06-04-2013
intercultural, News, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sexuality and satisfaction in virtuality

So called connected pleasure givers will be sold from the end of April on in China. It is another kind of artificial or instrumentalized way to find sexual satisfaction (alone, on one`own). It is a new way to give oneself and / or the other one, that means a partner or any other virtual person, sexual satisfaction without being together. Together means: both are not at the same place, in the same room but are connected via internet. They are both part of a virtual world.

They say that long distance relationships do not last not because the couples fall out of love, but because they miss ………..

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Dogs, dogs, dogs….only dogs?

By: Ulrich Sollmann
03-04-2013
intercultural, News, nonverbal communication, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dogs, dogs, dogs….only dogs?

A Chinese man saw many many many dogs on a lorry in the province Jiangsu. It was meant to bring them to a slaughterhouse to kill them.

He felt a pity with these dogs and offered 8000 US dollars to set all these dogs free. Afterwards someone took this wonderful picture of those “hugging dogs and man”.

Well one could say, this man wants to save animals. One could say he felt a pity and saved them.

One thing is true and convincing when you look at the photo: all of them enjoy to be together with each other. I not very often saw just a joyful scene. And in some way there is also some kind of a little envy in me. An envy which opens up one´s own heart and brings back hope and trust, if it should be hidden somewhere, somehow.

Do you remember the last time you had that feeling? 🙂

http://www.examiner.com/article/introducing-ping-an-a-fu-stray-animal-rescue

 

 

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Body language of Zuckerberg

By: Ulrich Sollmann
31-03-2013
Body language, intercultural, nonverbal communication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Body language of Zuckerberg

Both look, seen from the nonverbal perspective, very nice and cute. They seem to be made from the same quality. From a very sweet quality. And thus there are obvious differences. Important differences:

While she shows up with her heart (feelings), he hides behind his dark sun glasses. Dark sun glasses over here in Europe identify a man as some kind of mafia boss, personality with e hidden message or so.

Of course Zuckerberg is no mafia boss ……………..

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The direct look into someone`s eyes

By: Ulrich Sollmann
30-03-2013
Body language, intercultural, nonverbal communication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The direct look into someone`s eyes

Of course people in China look at each other, look into each other’s eyes. But often, especially in specific management situations, negotiations and so on it is not opportune to look into the other’s eyes too intensively, too long or to directly. This could be experienced as too close, too emotional and too offensive.

I get the fantasy that Chinese look at each other but really are not familiar with the experience of “to show up” and “to be seen”. Experiencing such a situation would be to …………

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Woman flirting with her hair

By: Ulrich Sollmann
29-03-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, psychology

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Woman flirting with her hair

Here is one more little information about I will call it „hair-gestures“ of women. It is quite, as probably most of you will know, important for the relationship between men and women. 😉

Here are four quite important gestures which are familiar to people in the western hemisphere:

  • A woman softly touches her hair and throws it back. This means “Hello, I want and need your awareness”
  • A woman is talking to you and puts her hair behind her ear. She shows that she feels very good and familiar in this situation, together with you.
  • If a woman tears her hair (out) and…………….
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Think about it

By: Ulrich Sollmann
27-03-2013
intercultural, News, society

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Think about it

There is no school equal to a decent home and no teacher equal to a virtuous parent.

~ Gandhi

http://www.google.de/imgres?hl=de&biw=1280&bih=519&tbm=isch&tbnid=Tb26GIYEQTkxmM:&imgrefurl=http://www.eliteoftheworld.com/elite_detail/104/Mahatma-Gandhi/photos_albums&docid=QaPlExTca3zaEM&imgurl=http://www.eliteoftheworld.com/images/gallery/1306172313mahatma-gandhi-india-elites-2.jpg&w=280&h=280&ei=FbpSUerxN4n64QS-sYCYCA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=890&vpy=4&dur=2204&hovh=224&hovw=224&tx=120&ty=134&page=2&tbnh=146&tbnw=147&start=17&ndsp=27&ved=1t:429,r:33,s:0,i:253

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Parents in U.S. and China both lie to their dids, study says

By: Ulrich Sollmann
24-03-2013
intercultural, nonverbal communication, science, society
 
 
Parents in the U.S. and China both lie to their kids, study says
 

„If you don`t come with me now, then I will leave you here alone“.

This is the most popular lie in USA and China, to make children to behave in a “proper” way, that means in the way the parents want them to behave. Some parents, so is the result of some new scientific study, even threat their children with their own death.

A client of mine told me some day another way how her mother tried to gain complete power on her daughter when she was young. She wanted her daughter not to lie. Thus she tried to obtain this power on her daughter in a cruel way.

With complete success as the daughter ……….

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